Too Late and So many regrets

Why wasn't I taught how to assess the tasks that make up a course of action in many of the key activities in life? Now I have a more precise ability to list all the things that needs to happen before something can happen from my study of logistics and found some coping mechanisms  to deal with procrastination and anxiety but I have this so late in life.
Collecting so many coping mechanisms that so many other people grew up with makes me regretful of my background and envious at the advantage they had and the success they got in their 20s while I'm barely building up in my late 30s :(

As I try to run 15km and try to meet +60k steps a week I already feel the limits and lack of time I have to turn things around. Continuously lacking in the min standards for health just to be fit enough to fight  :( and with a mind that is improving too slowly for the work it needs to accomplish.
All I can say is that my son will not have my disadvantages. Even if something happens to me my constant journalizing will be useful for him to realize what tools I have for him.

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