Apples

eating apples. I remember how it was to bite into an apple and ravage
it at my pleasure. I used to be fond of apples as a kid. I was also
fond of what I was able to gnaw, chew and bite with my teeth. despite
them being twice broken.

the memory of eating apples, unfortunately, will just remain a memory.
even tho I can afford my own apples and can by the really nice and
crunchy ones, my jaw condition will give me sleepless pain. that has
been the theme of growing up towards my 30s.

A lot of things have been more painful or uncomfortable to bear
compared to when I was much younger.

no more pizza eating contests with my brother gaspar, no more maxing
out buffets, no more junk food, inbetween meal snacks, and no more
cooking ultra rich cheese drowned dishes.

Worry is my new snack these days. it keeps me chewing and grinding my
teeth, even in my sleep. Experience a funny way of substituting the
power of knowledge with powelessness of reality.

this is the year I turn 30 and i'm surprised how much a year of work
can change me.

Right now i'm at the dentist. she checking to see what is the best
approach given my tooth and jaw condition.

Like Stanis Baratheon, I have a nasty habit of grinding. I know it is
just going to get worse, so measures are being considered to
compensate.

Roy Dotrice reading. Roy Dotrice's reading of A Song of Ice and Fire
is still the best. I would like to use the Gurps Mass Combat system
ans my GURPS-home brew system hybrid for it.

the hybrid doesn't change any rules btw. it works on a descriptive
based method of character creation. Instead of plain numeric stats. It
is just a more interesting way to make characters. It also allows to
keep more in theme and callibrates the narrative expectations for
players with that of the gm.

although I don't know if my players would know the difference of a
landed income to that of a barron's income.

anyway I can plan and write all I want about games there is a fat
chance i'll get players for it unless I breed my own.

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