Some Flak so early in the Day

mom. she just called to criticize my life. I'm married living away from her and she still manages to get me upset. She can only guess why i don't call. Anyway, i have a lot to catch up on. Its my full time job to get better FAST. There are those artists who were able to fix up their life earlier or have support instead of pessimism.

I'm delayed. Turning 28 I have to be kick ass by the end of the year and build up a illustration portfolio, not to mention get mahadlika off the ground.

I would have been so much better off with some support for my decisions and dreams... but life is so far from the ideal. I'm doing this mostly by myself. Learning it all from the web and maxing out what i can glean from my observational skills.

Its tough when the better artists in the world come from BETTER worlds.

Mom has a habit of wearing away your resolve to what she THINKS is best. It sucks and worse is that its crippling to your confidence. I don't need that crap. I was in the middle of studying different styles, first thing in the morning after dropping off my wife.

FIRST thing in the morning, all i can think of his how much I have to improve and to get working on learning what i need to learn, in a country that doesn't pay their artists what they deserve. Its a pretty hard fight, but financially, i'm ok cause of my parents money and the cash gifts in our marriage (which mostly came from the bride side).

Anyway, I'm going to buy an notebook, have breakfast, and sketch a little while i'm out. The Studio Ghibli collection really helped allow me what attributes should i focus on and use more often to enhance my abilities.

Its fucking hard... and I come from a background with very little trained artists. Heck, all my friends are self taught. I love my school, but they don't have any world class illustrators. neither do any of the other schools (bec its hell making money here to have time to teach... but I can pull it off (bec. we have no kids yet YAY!!!))

Goals. Become a world class illustrator. Get Mahadlika off the ground. Make it international contacts for freelance illustration work. Share this resources with my fellow unconnected/out-of-the-loop starving artists friends. Make world class illustrators out of talented Filipino youths who do not get the support (both morale and financial).

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